Awareness helps you recognize what’s happening within you. Alignment requires you to do something with what you’ve discovered.

Sometimes we know what is true, yet continue making decisions from fear, familiar patterns, or the expectations of others.

Alignment isn’t about perfection. It’s about allowing truth to influence how you think, choose, and live.

This week’s reflection: Where am I continuing to agree with something I now recognize isn’t true?

Your next step: Identify one thought, habit, or decision that needs to come into agreement with truth. Start there.

With intention,
Lou | EQwithLou

As we move forward, may we find ourselves prepared and postured for peace. Content with the Lord…

& Stewarding the oil and the grace well as we Seek Him, Hear Him. Inquire & Interpret Him. Place our faith in Him. Live in Truth with Him.

How do you write what people actually want to read?

Writing what people actually want to read is not as easy as it sounds. Mostly, I write for those who are led to read whether it’s read or not.

I used to try to write for others but honestly I believe like many of the art forms, writing is for the person writing it.

I’ve never been one to write for the numbers or for fame or popularity. I USED to think I wanted to be well known but I’ve since learned that well known means that you will be scrutinized more.

Honestly, there’s a scripture that comes to mind that resonates with me. It’s from James chapter 3, verse 1:

“Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness.”

For me, this means there will be greater accountability, greater visibility, and greater responsibility- none of which can be taken lightly.

Writing what others want to read is no longer a goal of mine. I do hope that whoever reads what I write finds themselves aware, aligned, and authentically accepted.

What’s the kindest thing someone has ever done for you?

The kindest thing anyone has ever done for me was to “hold space”.

Historically I look back over my life and consider some of the greatest times. Those who held space for me were all very different but their approach to me was the same:

“there’s room for you here. No need to be less. No pressure to be more”.

I think that holding space for other people is the action item to the state of peace.

It’s when we start infringing on the space of there’s that it first usually go well.

She has little sense of personal space & is quite curious. 🧐

Last weekend I snuck away to a beautiful pasture filled with butterflies, hummingbirds, five rescue dogs, & one rescue donkey.

I did NOT plan to go anywhere. In fact, it allowed me to disconnect from the noise so I could perceive God.

No, I can’t tell you everything God said to me in those private quiet moments but I CAN share this:

—> THIS is not the time to forget the hard times or the promises God has given you. Every word spoken will be fulfilled.

A few words I pray encourage, edify, or exhort you in the coming days:

• Let your faith be in Him, not you.
• Repent now, & return to Him.
• John 3:17 says, For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

God is watching to see that his word is fulfilled & no word has ever returned to him unfulfilled!

Jeremiah 1:12. NIV The LORD said to me, “You have seen correctly, for I am watching to see that my word is fulfilled.”

1. God’s word is TRUE.

1. Psalms 119:160 KJV – Thy word is true from the beginning: and every one of thy righteous judgments endureth for ever.
2. Psalms 138:2 – You have magnified Your Word above all Your name!
3. Proverbs 30:5 AMP – Every word of God is tried and purified; He is a shield to those who trust and take refuge in Him.
4. John 17:17 NKJV – Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth. 

•Application —> It will NOT return to him void and WILL accomplish for the purpose God has set for it! 

The reason this matters is because there are a LOT of people talking but only one voice that matters most: God.

No matter what your month of August was like, May you see that you are NOT forgotten in September .

God loves you so dearly and even when no one else is aware of your struggle, God is. He never left you, even in the hard things.

I pray that if you don’t know Jesus, you’ll ask him into your heart and believe in Him: that He is your redeemer and that God so loved you that he gave his only begotten son so that you and I might not perish but have life everlasting. Jesus Christ is the one who came to redeem each of us for we are ALL in need of a Savior.

Quick personal story:

When I first began praying to Him, I wasn’t even sure my prayers were going anywhere. I thought they ran into the ceiling or that I wasn’t doing something right, or worse, that I had been overlooked.

Truth be known, the amount of trauma I had experienced had altered my perception of any purpose I had in the world and I was sure the only life I would ever have was desolation and misery. But God.

I used to struggle believing in God because of the hard things I had seen and how I had been mistreated as a child, But God.

I remember professing to others about my doubt and my unbelief…But God.

It wasn’t until I read the Holy Bible that I learned those terrible things I had experienced were not things that occurred at the hand of God and that pain, misery, and lack were NEVER His plan for me or you. I learned that I had been chosen, set apart, and consecrated for His purpose.

I learned that just maybe there was more; more life, more joy, more peace…& that God’s will for any of our lives is never about earning His love but accepting it.

I learned that “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” (John 1:1)

I learned that God created man from earth and breathed life into mankind from his own breath! And that long before mankind existed, God’s word coexisted FROM THE BEGINNING.

I learned that God himself was the one who looked to expand his kingdom by empowering man to manage and steward the earth. Until mankind errored. But God.

Yet here we are well into the New Testament learning about how the people the Bible talks about are constantly complaining, dismissing God, his protections, & forgetting where and How God provided for them.

God’s intention was NEVER that mankind would mistreat one another. In fact, he gave Moses a very specific set of instructions for us to follow to keep us safe- to protect His investment in us.

Now, you might be wondering what investment?

The investment that God put in you. You are the answer to a problem in this world. 🌎

Yessss, God knew you and I long before we were ever formed in our mother’s womb…and He put purpose in us.

You may be like I used to be and doubt if God is real because of your own experience in the world, but I would gently ask you who or what impacted you in the experience you’re thinking of?

In closing: our human experiences and circumstances often interrupt our perception of God’s purpose in our lives. But God.

Just because you messed up, the world rejected you, you’ve had trauma, you are scared, you have questions or whatever the case may be, you have no reason NOT to explore the life of Jesus.

No, we can’t follow the instructions set forth by our strength alone. We need the same Spirit of God to help us. But God.

God gave each of us a free will and he doesn’t come in and move us around as though we were chess pieces. He is politely waiting for our partnership. He is waiting for us to partner with Him in prayer and for us to invite him.

I know for a fact that He does soften our hearts and draw us near to him as we draw near to him.

When a person receives Jesus as their Lord and Savior and confesses their need of Him, they enter into a relationship with him and are filled with Holy Spirit who is not only our helper but seals our redemption. (see book of John)

Holy Spirit is a person, not a ghost or a figment of our imagination. He is real and grieves and desires that you and I would live the abundant life that God so desires for us. NOT a life of shame, confusion, and chaos. It is God’s will that we know Him and that we are in an active relationship with him.

It’s not too late. Turn off the noise. Listen to God. Practice his presence and set your eyes on Him. No matter how hard things are right now, God is with you. Our inability to perceive him does NOT change the fact that He IS with us.

If you have questions, need prayer, a Bible, or anything at all, please reach out. Now is the time to know God, not later. You are loved deeply by the one who created everything. Peace & love to you all.

Do NOT be discouraged or dismayed…

As I read about Joshua, something occurred to me. The Lord told him several times not to be afraid or discouraged because He is with him.

Joshua already knew of the Lord and of the Lord’s soverignty, yet the Lord was intentional about assuring him…in accordance with His purpose.

I wondered as I read this passage if Joshua was able to conceptualize how big his assignment really was? The word of God tells us that:

“Moses, my servant is dead. Now then, you and all these people, get ready to cross the Jordan River into the land I am about to give them–to the Israelites.

Joshua 1:2

We see that the Lord was very clear. This assignment? It was never about Joshua alone. How many times have I thought to myself about my assignment as though it were mine alone?

If it’s for God, it is never ours alone.

About Delay…

Note that Joshua didn’t wait to begin the work–he simply obeyed. I wonder how many times I’ve delayed because I was thinking too small or because I was attempting to understand fully before I moved.

Maybe I did it out of fear or maybe I needed the reassurance from God? I know many times I had delayed because of the difference. I noticed it was different and historically the world taught me that my different was deficient. BUT GOD.

God had already decided that different is NOT deficient.

Many are aware that things are different. This difference is the very reason many are experiencing increased awareness of the need for use of skills, resources, & knowledge differently.

About Stewardship…

Think ‘Stewardship’: Stewardship of the word, relationships, and our hearts. In him, we will not faulter. With His word written on our hearts and our treasures stored in heaven, we will not be weighed down by doubt.

Fast forward to this morning. Upon waking, I sat in prayer. I thought of the story of Joshua after understanding that the Lord was present with me and that He had never left me. I realized that even though things look different, it doesn’t mean they’re deficient.

Can you imagine being presented with an opportunity so big that the mere idea of obedience begins to feel like oblivion?

If you’ve ever delayed, know this: The Lord himself has already accounted for every step you take, when you take it, and how you take it. Just maybe if you and I incline our hearts to him, we will find that His word is a lamp to our path.

Now about the assignment…

It was never about the weight of the assignment but was always about the weight of the glory of God. May you and I find ourselves whole heartedly resolved to meditate on the word of God-day and night so that we will not grow weary in doing good. (See 2 Chronicles 31:21)

May we find that we’ve practiced good stewardship in relation to the word of God, the work of God, and the wealth of our inheritance as children of God who are called to be set apart for God’s own purpose, not our own.

May we know that the Lord himself has sent provision for the hand-off from the last season to the next. In the days coming, things definitely look different to you and I, but may we be rest assured that the difference is not deficient.

How do you deal with uncertainty?

I deal with uncertainty better than I used to! I used to panic. I used to fret. I used to worry about the outcome so much so that I forgot to enjoy the process.

Once my life had spiraled out of control and I found myself unable to press on, I decided to do something differently. I stopped letting my emotions manage me and started to understand that they were signals to understand; not directions to follow.

Every emotion is an indication of something underneath. Once I learned that my emotions carried valuable information, I began interpreting them as clues to what was really going on. I learned in graduate school about the functions of our body, the chemicals, and the very primitive way our body works.

Truth be known, our bodies are very “needs based” and while emotions often indicate a need, our brains don’t always interpret the cues correctly. Sometimes when we perceive something that looks familiar or tells a story of “old” in the current moment, we are actually operating from an old conclusion.

I learned to recognize that uncertainty was a clue that I felt powerless or that I was feeling unsafe in some way. Now, I catch it, check it, change it ™️. This is a framework I created with the insight God gave me in Jeremiah 2:13, which challenges me to look at the thing behind the thing. In other words, I’m no longer functioning on fumes. Instead I’m learning to turn to him for ALL of my needs.

Reference: Jeremiah 2:13 says For my people have committed two evils: they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.”

In other words, many times uncertainty indicates that I’ve been pulling from broken cisterns, or sources that are not sustainable. Do you recognize your cisterns?

If not, or if you want more awareness of those cisterns and want to walk through them in a closed safe space, consider registering for the September sessions. Included is a small group experience, weekly sessions on Sunday nights in September from 7pm – 8:30pm. I’ll share the link and if you have any questions, let me know!

Emotional Reset Journey

Matthew 6:33 says “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

The word doesn’t tell us to seek blessings and all these things” before it tells us to seek the kingdom! 

This is why order matters.

This is why stewardship matters! 

As alignment occurs in tandem with order, there will be no disruption to the flow of oil. 

Many are walking around in a state of ‘disorder’ because they are out of alignment.

Want less disorder? Reprioritize your heart. It’s not an easy work, but the reward is eternal.

Let’s discuss development. Development implies progress.

• Avoiding development doesn’t speed it up.
• Denying it doesn’t stop it.
• Delaying it doesn’t slow it down.

Why? Development is essential.

The things that we avoid don’t move; we do.

I’ve tried to avoid, delay, or deny development, but it continues.

Scripture says that many are the plans of a person’s heart, but God’s purpose prevails.

Learning from development, whether I agree or not, is inevitable. All experiences are opportunities to learn.

So, what’s the point?

You can resist development, but you’re in the process. Enjoy the process.

Development is not experienced alone.

The most beautiful experiences are often shared, and the greatest connections are often over shared experiences during development. 

Becoming the best person involves allowing others to help shape us. While some parts of development are private, much is shared. Authenticity strengthens our connections.

But the truest connections correct and shape us. In love, they urge us toward our best selves by teaching us to unlearn painful particulars that keep us stuck and to be brave enough in the parts that propel us.

Gratitude is necessary.

I’m grateful for those who’ve helped me develop. I’ve learned that connection requires the courage to confront yourself…and it becomes purposeful when done with others.

Be encouraged. You haven’t seen the fully developed picture yet, and one day, you’ll understand how and why it looks the way it does.  

True story: 

In my early days of being saved, I found myself earnestly seeking the Lord, or so I thought.

But because I was not aware that I was seeking validation, I jumped into service work.

I found myself volunteering, looking for ways to be validated and useful.

Why? Because my eyes were on me and my feelings.

Then as things progressed, the Lord convicted me.

I was confused because I was doing all the right things, but the work was not yet done in me. 

I soon found my gaze shifted, and the things that the Lord was showing me about myself were things I was soon observing in others.

I watched their works instead of my own…

Blissfully ignorant to my own pitfalls.

At first, I didn’t say anything, but inside I felt everything.

See, when you ignore a “need,” it doesn’t go away. 

You might stuff it, stick it, or try to suffocate it, but it doesn’t go away. It gains urgency because our needs communicate something very intrinsic to our lives.

I watched leaders, and what I was observing was something I was familiar with long before I knew it acknowledged God. This made it so much easier to focus on because as long as I’m focused on your footstool, I won’t see mine.

Besides, I’m wired to strategize and survive, so I sought the Lord in prayer for strategy that would give a solution.  I was too prideful to admit to anyone that I was full of shame. So I did what I had always done: I worked. I lost myself in it under the hat of being a “martyr.” 

I learned that I could no more accept ownership of your mistakes than you could mine, but I could be distracted by them. 

While the gospel of Jesus is widely talked about, criticized, taught, discussed, and shared—what’s rarely talked about is how this process of transformation is HIGHLY personal.

But I digress. 

Sadly, my service became my work.

Gracefully, the Lord taught me that it is by grace I am saved and not by my works.

Unfortunately, I didn’t realize that by ignoring my pain—I was actually creating bitterness and urgency. 

I was setting myself up for a letdown…and boy, was it a letdown. It was a fall that fortunately was private….but the downfall of many leaders, teachers, apostles, etc.—it is not?

Why does this matter? 

Because the word tells us that those who are teachers will be judged more strictly. 

This is where my clinical experience both as a nurse and a psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner comes in.

How?

In that while I’m sitting with you, my own needs are temporarily on the back burner. 

The point: Many leaders are bleeding out and you’re too focused on the surface-level problem to see what it is that the Lord would have you to see: the real issue. 

Leaders are not meant to meet your needs.

They are there to help you through your journey with the Lord, but if you’re focused on their needs or works, you’re delaying your own change. 

Too many people are looking to humans for that which only God can give.

The word tells us to seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

I found myself quickly seeking God on behalf of others’ needs long before I was seeking Him for my own! Maybe it was a subconscious decision or maybe it wasn’t, idk, but what I do know is that:

when my seek changed from validation and belonging from men to the kingdom of God, my perspective changed.

I write today to encourage each of us to continually seek the Lord and His kingdom. If you find yourself focused on the issues, needs, or decisions of others—

please ask the Lord to reveal Himself to you. The VERY thing you’re needing—> it’s in Him, and He is one who knows the truth.

I know firsthand that I cannot rely on my mind or my revelation. I know that each of us is a part of the body—the kingdom, no matter where we stand, sit, or who we know. 

I know that at one time or another:

I have been the forever among us. 

I have been the woman at the well. 

I have been the one who is prideful. 

I have been the one who was vengeful.

I have been the stiff-necked one.

I have been the foolish one.

I have been the reckless one.

And the list goes on….

So now, 

Repentance reveals the heart of our Father to us, and in this, we find every area of darkness in our hearts made true. How so? Because we surrender ourselves, our ways, and experience a renewal in doing so. It’s truly an ongoing humbling experience that requires consistent application.

In closing: 

Don’t waste your time on the problems of man, please! 

Find yourself asking the Lord to teach you to number your days so that you might gain a heart of wisdom. 

(Psalm 90:2) and remember to guard your heart, for out of it springs the issues of life. 

Be careful what you spew out or speak out! The same way you judge others, you will find yourself judged. Know this: the fact that you are being able to see the “issue” in someone else isn’t for them. It’s for you because the gospel is between you and God alone, but collectively we are all living, needed, & here on purpose. 

It’s personal but it’s interpersonal. Meaning that we each need to see clearly so that we can continue in fighting the good fight!

Do not forsake the assembly! Why? Because it is part of where you and I are developed! It’s part of where our faith is built! It’s not a prison but an opportunity for each of us to strengthen, celebrate God, and as a way for us to be developed and matured in our faith!

Thank you for reading and may you and I find ourselves continually seeking the Lord in all things so that there will be complete unity in the body. 

What’s a quote that perfectly describes your outlook on life?

Let’s talk about freedom & fear.

Yes, we have talked about fear one time before…but I’m talking about the fear you don’t even REALIZE is holding you.

The one that stops you from elevating to your NEXT level of greatness…

BC even though you’re being pushed & keep getting green lights saying the time is now…you DON’T move.

Yep, THAT is the one.

No, we aren’t giving credit to any entity here other than ourselves.

If you’ve identified with anything I said & read this far, here is your next step—

PAUSE.

THINK about what is HOLDING you back?

For me, it wasn’t failure.

It was fear of THE GREATNESS…(sounds strange, I know) but come with me;

I honestly knew that if I put my mind to anything I could do it…

*But WHAT would happen when I reached my goal? 

~greater responsibility 

~I’d stand out

~I’d no longer be able to shrink into the small places I was used to

The issue was my mindset.

We’ve been set free—so why do we imprison ourselves? 

This is WHY Marianne Williamson’s famous quote often misattributed to Nelson Mandela is so VALUABLE:

“Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.” 

Remember manage your emotions or they WILL manage you ✌🏻

~EQWITHLOU LLC

Are you a lifelong learner?

I am a lifelong learner, but I’m not sure that it was a decision I made. I believe that we are all motivated by different desires.

One of these things that I enjoy most is learning. I used to think that I was a terrible student until I realized that my brain was wired a little bit differently than what I was talked to expect.

One of the most frustrating things that I have experienced about being a lifelong learner is the way that it has impacted my response to questions because I am usually seeking a solution.

I have often expected myself for my own beliefs and joy and learning from other people. I realize this is a very narrow view because learning is not always a fun experience however, learning has always been a safe place for me. It wasn’t until I stopped, questioning my experience and started embracing my way of thinking

I am not merely suggesting that we overlook the need for standardized and measurable learning out outcomes, but I am highly suggesting that we consider that not every brain is wired exactly the same. And in taking this in consideration, we can find ourselves being open to helping to shape students instead of making students fit into the shape.

There are so many people who are stuck in the state of rejection… but that was NEVER the original plan. Here’s the first part of the discussion:

https://streamyard.com/fpz22pczb9e8

Why? Because the next is borrowed, but the NOW is given.

I used to strive for happiness, joy, satisfaction, and contentment yet all of those things were things that I could not acquire through common means.

All of this came only when my mind came into alignment with truth. How did that happen?

It happened first by acknowledging that I was living outside of the present moment. It was as if I was ignoring where I was but operating without all of the information needed to make the transaction.

It was as if I had a price tag attached to every single moment because I was looking to pay for it with currency I didn’t even have!!!!!

It continued through recognition of the need for what I now know as grace.

Grace to grow!

Grace to give!

Grace to receive!

Somehow I was certain that Grace was for everybody else and not me…and that I had to come up with the currency to EARN the Grace before I could get to my next.

So what EXACTLY am I saying?

That NONE of us has to pay for grace. Grace is what is given but not deserved. Grace is what is often refused because people think & live as if it has to be earned. Frankly, NONE of that is true.

Grace isn’t earned.

Grace isn’t a currency for a select few.

Grace isn’t something that few have and more long for.

Grace is given to EACH of us as a demonstration of the goodness of God, which has absolutely nothing to do with how much we pay to get it.

Ephesians 2:8-9, For it is by grace you have been saved,through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.

It is my prayer that your faith is the currency that causes you to receive the the grace that you can’t earn, outrun, or disqualify yourself from.

It is my prayer that you understand that everything you need is in the presence of God because He knew you long before you came into the world. It is His will that you experience joy, peace, steadfastness, & contentment that propels you to your next!

Because of the grace I’ve been shown and the heart posture I find myself in “most” of the time, I tend to view the world this way. Why? It’s simply because when I look back over my life, I see the evidence of how He kept me.

I realize this is not EVERYONE’s experience, but it has been mine. Have I always seen the evidence while I was in the moment? No, but I feel really grateful to have the ability to look back without going back as a reminder of the fact that “he has never left me nor forsaken me”.

I’m not writing today to “convert” anyone. I’m simply writing to share a perspective & an experience I had when I met a person who told me they were atheist one time. For those who don’t know, an atheist is an individual who “doesn’t believe in the existence of God”. It’s always interesting to me how people respond when someone shares their belief.

For me, I didn’t find myself “desiring” to quickly convert this person, challenge their belief, or attempt to prove them wrong. I found myself in a posture of yield.

No, I did not agree with their belief because that had not been my experience, but I did operate in a heart posture of yield as I invited Holy Spirit in to the moment.

From this posture I was able to listen without trying to lead.

I was able to be fully present in the conversation without being overwhelmed by the opinions of the other person.

Here’s what I know, a long time ago I once had thoughts, questions, and strong beliefs about the God who would allow terrible tragic things to happen to children, women, and those who were vulnerable. I distinctly remember growing up thinking that there was no way that God would not use his power to stop these terrible things if he was real.

But everything changed when I experienced the presence of God. Now, many years later I look back and I can clearly see the long line of evidence that I was NEVER alone. From the darkest moments of my life when I thought there was nothing to live for to the moments I’ve seen things that can ONLY be explained by the supernatural presence and power of God.

I would NEVER have had the opportunity to share these experiences with the other person if I had forgotten about my own life experience with doubt, questioning, and disbelief if I had shut them down.

Please listen to what others have to say from a heart posture of love. Let love lead your mouth, your mind, & the moment. It’s in these very moments that the power of God can come in quickly and make a way out of now way.

The difference between a door and a window is simply the purpose. Doors are meant to be passed through. They often represent the departure or the entrance to another space.

A window on the other hand offers a glimpse into that space without having to enter into it. I wonder though, if we could recognize that our past experiences are not something we need to forget because they offer us the ability to use the CHOICE, we have to revisit it.

I’m grateful for the experiences I’ve had in my life- even those that have been unpleasant or very difficult because they’ve helped shape my perspective.

Rather than asking questions like “What if I had or had not experienced the hardships” etc., I find myself opening the glass door in crucial moments for reference, reflection, and as a reminder.

Reference

Visiting past experiences as a point of reference is necessary for so many reasons, but most importantly it helps me to check the narrative that I have in my head against the truth. It’s so easy to get caught up in the moment that I quickly forget the very idea that my brain may be “misremembering”.

It’s true. Depending on the state of our health, stress, and overall emotional intelligence, our brain could be responding to data that is no longer relevant.

Reflection

Choosing to go through the glass door allows me to reflect on my life, my circumstances, and my heart posture. I can choose to reflect on these previous times in my life as a way of recognizing progress, not perfection. It’s incredibly easy to avoid the past all together, but the truth is that our brain isn’t actually avoiding anything except discomfort.

Between our hippocampus, amygdala, and prefrontal cortex, we may be receiving alarm bells for situations that “appear” dangerous but were actually misinterpreted.

Reminder

Our past often serves as a reminder for each of us that we aren’t where we once were even though we may find ourselves not quite where we want to be.

For me, it’s served as a reminder of the resilience I have, the grace I’ve been given, and the amazing community of people I’m connected to who have been kind, loving, and crucial to my present moment.

Whatever you do, I hope that you are brave enough to walk through the door instead of standing at the window. Challenge the thoughts you have but be sure to challenge them. Challenge them with the experiences of your past AND your present to ensure that you are not peeking through a window instead of purposely passing through the glass door.

Now is not the time to lose your head. Now is not the time to make random noise. Let your noise be a noise of truth, not opinion. What we’re seeing is not about division because if it was, truth would be in the middle of it.

Truth is truth. Right is right. Wrong is wrong.

No matter where you or I stand on any issue, the truth of the matter is that we are all accountable for the noise we make. We cannot afford to put ourselves in a position that causes unnecessary, harmful or false division.  Wisdom IS the principal thing! Most of the noise that is being made right now is coming from a place that is grounded in pain, distrust, fear, hurt, and in emotional dysregulation. Take heed! Do NOT succumb to the urge to come out of your character because you must prove a point. A fool’s way is right in his own eyes, but whoever listens to counsel is wise!

Your Brain May Have Put You In A Compromising position.

We’ve come to a place where people cannot see past their emotions to see the truth. I am upset about the things that I am seeing, and I believe that many of us feel so disheartened and disgusted by it because it is the opposite of what we were created to be. To see leaders and people stoop to the lowest of lows because they’ve committed to an opinion rather than truth, puts us all in a compromising position.  

Emotional Processing & Why This Matters.

A few weeks ago, I talked about our brain & how it operates on a very fundamental level for the purpose of keeping us alive- MORE specifically, I shared some information about emotional processing.

Why This Matters to Me.

I spent a lot of years in emotional dysregulation & burnout because I lacked emotional intelligence. As a result, I hurt other people with the things I said and the way I behaved.  Since reaching this awareness, I’ve been doing my best to be a better human being. It started with repentance. A turning away from. A willingness to receive corrections and now when I make noise, I sincerely hope it is an effective informed noise instead of reckless dysregulated noise.  

I didn’t realize that I was not using the tool of my emotions in the best way possible.  I’m hoping that in sharing this today, you, as the reader, may find yourself in a position that allows you to make informed decisions and effective informed noise. Why? Because those of us who have been assigned to speak in this day, cannot be silent, which for some infers consent. I do NOT consent to WRONG. I consent to TRUTH.

Your Alarm System is Tripping!

This is so very important right now because I believe that too many of us are “losing our heads”. What do I mean? Essentially, the amygdala, or the emotional alarm system of our brains are hypersensitized and going off constantly.  With the increased usage of social media, the state of the world, and the horrific things being shared on media, our brains, aren’t catching a break, specifically our amygdala. 

Size Matters!

When we’re alarmed, startled, or surprised by something, we usually have a big reaction (internally or externally). If the thing that alarmed, startled, or surprised us is perceived by our brains as threatening, the reaction is bigger. The size of our emotional reaction is directly correlated with our strongest beliefs. This is important because if we lose sensitivity to the things that are dangerous to our lives as human beings, we no longer have an effective reaction.  This is a direct result of our limbic system and our brains constantly being assaulted creating an internal atmosphere of emotional unsafety as perceived in our environment.

Wake Your Brain Up & See If It’s Been Conditioned!

Hear me out.                               

My point in writing this is that there’s a LOT of noise right now because of the horrific, unkind, cruel & inhumane things that are happening. These things that are happening and then compounded by the sharing in the news, on the radio, social media are constantly barraging our brains and causing our alarm systems to trip or malfunction… If the things that we are seeing and experiencing are absolutely wrong, our brains will respond strongly unless they’ve been desensitized. In which case, there will be uninformed noise or less noise because people do not speak to the truth, therefore passively siding with the wrong.  Pay attention to how your brain is conditioned!

Is it Safe? Threatening? Rewarding?

 Our brains were designed to interpret data and determine one of three things: 1) Is it Safe? 2) Is it Threatening 3) Is it rewarding?  The effect of seeing, reading, hearing, and for many, experiencing this type of information that is on replay is devastating and conditioning a response. My ask in writing this is that each one of us take a personal inventory of our belief & upon doing so, find ourselves on the side of truth, rather than in an opinionated right or wrong.

Let Our Noise Be In Truth, Not Division.

Let us speak from love anchored places, not emotionally anchored spaces. Let us use our voice to make informed noise, not influence seeking noise. Let us stand together in unity, speaking up for justice, moving in integrity, with purpose of encouraging, edifying, and exhorting each other to be better as PEOPLE.  We are all people. Those who are appointed as leaders must do better. Leaders or those in leadership positions must make informed noise anchored in love AND truth, not the distorted noise of emotionally inept opinions.

Each one must be very careful, then how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. (Ephesians 5:15-17).

Where? What? When? How? Why? These are the questions that each of us must ask ourselves to start the process of true emotional awareness. Why? If we do not embark on this process, we can live a life that is lived partially finished.

We must learn to recognize emotions. This allows us to detect our emotions. By doing so, we can understand what they are communicating to us. Unfortunately, too many have feelings and believe that they are directions which often leads to incorrect destinations or outcomes. Yet at least 5 key points were covered in the first recording. This was part of the kingdom collaboration with in this here: Graced for This as a wellness partner.

Watch the entire session in this video on the EQwithLou YouTube page. This will help you start the process. Watch here: “Name the Thing“!

After you watch the video, you’ll have a better understanding of the following points & how to apply them to your life:

• Emotional awareness is not weakness. It’s clarity.
• Unnamed emotions often control behavior.
• Avoiding emotions does NOT remove them.
• Recognize that emotions & feelings are NOT the same.
• Start the process of “naming the thing”- the thing that’s working.

The people who tuned in to the teaching shared some insights. They found one teaching point particularly helpful: ’emotions are experienced before the development of language.’

We discussed the connection between our internal body state and our experience outside our body. This exploration allows further understanding of why each is equally important in our emotional health.

Most people do not realize that their childhood attachments are deeply connected to their current attachments. Is this hard to believe?

Even before you had words to describe them, your emotional experiences were shaped by the truth. Each point reflects this. This includes a brief understanding of the purpose of our brains. They were wired for peace and purpose.

Midway through the month, EQwithLou proudly offered another teaching. It was available on the EQwithLou YouTube channel and Facebook. It complimented the “Name the thing” lesson called

“Authentic Realignment“

In this session, I shared the first steps to recognize false emotional and spiritual sources. These sources can lead to emotional and behavioral misalignment. I provided very practical steps for authentic realignment.

I introduced a free PDF worksheet. It was provided exclusively for those who requested it. Participation in the session was also required. I received many responses from people about how that session empowered them. This truly confirmed that there is a strong wish among people. They want to better understand how to move from living in emotionally surviving to living in emotionally thriving about

I am very excited to teach this. I used to live much of my life in emotional survival mode. I have worked in the field of psychiatry for nearly 15 years. I have completed my master’s and doctorate’s degree in nursing practice. Despite these achievements, I have found that my lived experience has allowed me to share from that space.

All in all, we’re learning together! I hope something I share is useful to you. I pray that you are no longer operating from broken cisterns. Broken cisterns refer to a person’s life condition and state. They are not sustainable as a source for life. Find where your emotions are not drawing from sustainable sources. Then, invite and strengthen your connection to truth and yourself.

Believe it or not,

• Most of them didn’t ask for the cup they are  carrying.

  •If they had asked for it, they would have chosen not to endure the distress. This distress comes with the formation necessary to carry the cup.

•   The isolation.
•   The correction.
•   The cuts.
•   The compassion.
•   The depression.
•   The weight. 

As much as it “looks” like a glorified stage– the process of sharpening and correction that comes with being a shepherd or a teacher to the people of God- is one of the most humbling & misunderstood processes often NOT talked about.

The process of truly dying to yourself is significant. The desires of your own heart can sometimes cause you to reconsider your own life. You start questioning whether the pain is worth the promise. 

 This doesn’t mean that they lack faith. It means that they HAVE faith in the promises unseen or unrealized. They are aware of the INCREASED weight of glory of God. The process of becoming completely yielded to God is often misunderstood. It is unrealized by those who don’t share the same office.

The Space Between

To stand among men in a prostrate or kneeling position requires a total death of the person you once knew. A time when you must look in the opposite direction & thus meet God AT the end of yourself…

  Momentarily suspended between man and God is the space in-between. It is a difficult yet essential space. This space facilitates a total yield. It helps to tolerate and withstand the pressure of the anointing without it crushing you. 

Many aren’t offered or allowed safe spaces to grow while publicly being pushed to meet the needs of others. This creates a paradoxical experience between expectation and realization. The difference between the two often not accurately expressed in language to translate the breadth of the moment. 

  Many are falling, have fallen, and have been completely crushed. This happens before the very body that claims to honor God. It insists on pushing the weight and responsibility of their soul salvation on THIS leader. The leader didn’t ask for the cup or the formation. This formation comes from a completely yielded heart.

Misplaced Responsibility

  Every believer has the responsibility to look to God as their source. They should not rely on the teacher or shepherd placed before them.

  EVERY community that looks to God as source has a responsibility. They must honor the members placed within them. This includes the leader, the teacher, the greeter, the child, the man, and the woman.

  We’ve lost sight of the fact that the body can’t function without the correct orientation of the heart.

  The heart perceives and knows more than it lets on including the weight of the moment and the mantle. 

Often times the pastor is the shepherd, the one whose heart carries the burden for their flock. Far too many are willing to let this pastor -shepherd -do so. They do this without ever giving back to them. They also do not accept accountability for their own burdens.

  God has already identified the parts of the body of believers. But, the body has forgotten its role and purpose. 

 Let this acknowledge the misplaced weight of the current state. Each of us should consider our heart’s orientation. Think on the space where God met us, shaped us, and defined us. 

In the body presently we see:

  –> The greeter brings and exhibits joy & a spirit of unity all while- at times- feeling excluded…

 –> The media team is responsible for translating the message given all while concurrently wrestling with their own message and relationship-

   –> The usher is responsible for many things. They cover, pray, and often act as a midwife at the altar while they themselves NEED the altar.

  The prophet is responsible for giving the word of God in truth and spirit. They must also exhort, encourage, or edify others. At the same time, they themselves need to be built up, encouraged, or consoled themselves.

  The teacher has the responsibility to teach the lesson. At the same time, they receive the lesson. Often, they give of themselves before they’ve given to themselves.

  The child brings the curiosity, wonder, & the representation of each of us before we were persuaded by the world.

  God himself, in all his infinite wisdom, determines and assigns the cup. He knows the gifts within each of us. He understands the capacity of our cups! 

This is a call to action for the body- the ecclesia:

  Return to right alignment with God.

 •Apostles- return to pioneering! 

 •Prophets- return to prophesying that which God placed in your belly!

  •Evangelist- return to proclaiming the gospel- the greatest love story known to man!

  •Pastor- return to caring for & guarding the flock and shepherding the body!

  •Teacher- return to the grounding work of the word of God !

People of God, understand a crucial fact. Those who are called out and given these roles have undergone a transformation. This change cannot be seen! It was absolutely necessary for their process to be uncomfortable. It needed to be completed and covered during the transition. This was essential for them to fully die to themselves and their desires. They needed to have hearts that are in alignment with the heart of God.

They DID NOT choose this.

This was CHOSEN for them.

God chose them to do what they do. They are in the midst of their own transformation process. This process takes them from who they thought they were to who they are becoming!

Before they are what you see, they are all of what you don’t see!

The responsibility of the body in this?

Support them! Love them! Pray for them and their family! Do NOT give them authority over your life that is misplaced! Why? Because they, TOO, are flesh and blood with the same human liabilities that we have. They are NOT God and they are NOT responsible for your relationship with God. Do NOT elevate them beyond what God has told you to! Honor them without becoming too common with them. They are NOT common & THAT is intentional. Most of all, love them. Love them WELL.

In the words of the bible: 

1 Timothy 5:17-18 states that they are worthy of double honor!

1 Thessalonians 5:12-13 states that recognition is to be given to those who labor among you and lead you in the Lord and admonish you, and to regard them very highly because of their work.

Romans 15:30 shows us that we are to pray fervently for them! 

Hebrews 13:17 tells us to obey leaders and submit to them since they keep watch over your soul so that they can do so with you and NOT grief!

They are walking around as imitators of Jesus Christ who was perfect AND they are doing so as imperfect people. 

Simply stated, this means that we’re not taking the time or energy necessary to effectively communicate. If we were communicating effectively: consistently, clearly, and with context; it would be easier for those around us to manage their expectations.

You might be thinking to yourself that it’s not your job to manage their expectations.

In part, you’re right-but not completely.

Think 🤔 back to any moment you’ve paid for a service. Maybe you paid to go to the doctor, bought a car, or even more simply- you bought a coffee or a meal at a restaurant. When you went in, you knew what you wanted. Let’s use the coffee example.

You enter into your local coffee shop. Look at the menu while someone behind the counter waits to take your order. Once you’ve decided what you’d like and how you’d like it, you share your order with the barista. They receive & input your order ACCURATELY. They relay to you how much your favorite coffee costs and you pay them.

While you wait for your order, you step aside so they can help the next person.

When it’s ready, they call your name or your number and hand you your coffee.

Sounds simple enough right? I agree.

It IS pretty simple but if either one of you didn’t understand the expectations of the interaction, one of you may be upset or dissatisfied.

That was an incredibly simple but relatable example, yet it serves the purpose. When people come to you for anything whether it’s friendship, family, at your job, or at home-> it’s helpful to:

• Be consistent (to build trust & reliability)
• Be clear (clarity prevents confusion)
• Listen & receive ACCURATELY
• Clarify if necessary (to avoid misunderstanding)

Why though?

If you don’t, then you set an expectation.

If you do, you set an expectation.

In closing, what are you communicating to others about what they should or should not expect from you?!